Chapter 119

Richie took the towel and wiped his face. He was eager to find to his wife. The day had been an emotional rollercoaster to say the least, he needed her arms around him to make the day end better than it had started. He hoped Jon reached Geena, if not -- things wouldn’t be the same again for the rest of the tour.

He made his way to the back flashing a smile here and there to a passing crew member or two then turned to walk into his dressing room to find she wasn’t there. Maybe she's with Geena still. He started to pivot on his heel and go look in Jon's area when he noticed familiar scribbling on the pad he usually kept stray lyrics on. Lifting the pad up he began to read.

My dearest dearest love,

I know I promised you that I'd never just vanish again, so I am taking these precious few moments to let you know that when you come backstage you won't find me. Nor will I be at the hotel.

It wasn't enough Rich, whatever he did during Roses erased whatever he'd almost done. She's leaving baby and I can't let her go off alone. I know you'll be angry with me, I know I am probably fucking up the best thing I have, but she's my best friend.

I loved how you did your song, I caught every wink and movement meant for me, and I regret I can't reward you for that. .... I love you sweetheart. Never forget that. I do love you.

Bri.

His heart sank as the words on the paper sank in. Ice cold pain shafted through him as he noticed the tear splotches on the paper. Ice cold fear raced through his veins. Fear that quickly turned to anger. Turning around he stormed out to Jon's area and waited for him to step into his room, the urge to beat some sense into his thick skull rising by the second. Because of his fuck up he’d lost his wife. He’d meant what he said to Bri. If Jon fucked up even more he was through. Almost 30 years of partnership would be flushed down the fuckin' toilet. And all because of that fuckhead’s inability to control his mouth and temper around gentle women who couldn’t take it like the guys did.

Richie paced the floor until Jon hit the room. Stepping forward he shoved the crinkled paper into his hands. "Read that fuckhead. See what damage you fuckin' caused.” His voice was so dark it sent the roadie that had walked in with Jon hustling out the door.

He read over the note and felt everything inside of him shut down. He'd failed. When it truly counted he had failed. Looking back up at Richie he felt the urge to run from his friend. The anger in those brown eyes were absolute, and promising the death of everything he knew. "They left?"

Richie shot him an dark look "Well it sure as hell doesn't say they went to the mall now does it ? "

He winced. Richie's humor was usually light, but the dark tone to his friend’s voice had all internal sensors screaming like the robot from Lost in Space. Danger Jonny Boy Danger Danger.

He took a nonchalant step over to his couch before glancing back. "So we just figure out where they are and go get them. We have time. Philly isn't for three days Rich."

Richie snorted " You think its gonna be that easy asshole? My wife left because you hurt yours, and she won’t leave G as long as G doesn't wanna come back. So buddy if you don’t fuckin' fix this? Well you can just say you lost a guitarist right here and right now. " Richie stepped closer, "And I mean it."

"Oh come on man. Sabrina is a grown woman. There had to be more of a reason. Maybe you did something...." His words trailed off as Richie took a menacing step forward. His hands lifted in a stop movement. "Besides, you have a contract. You signed it this year, or did the little wife help you forget that iota of information?"

"No my wife didn't do anything other than be the friend Geena needs right now because her jackass of a husband can’t figure out how to fucking treat her right. Funny play on words ain't it bro? And no I didn't forget the fuckin’ contract. Guess what? It don’t fucking matter to me So the fuck what? Sue me asshole. I'll be damned if I lose the best thing that’s every happened to me because of YOU! " Richie practically screamed the last word. “Some things are just worth more than contracts and money man, When the hell are you going to learn that one?”

He stepped into the room, hands fluffing curls as he took in the tableau of anger. "Woah ho ho, The big boys are fighting."

When both men turned to glare his way he grinned, "What? Do I need to call a nurse to fly in and give you BOTH a shot of brainiac medicine?"

Richie sucked in a deep breath and counted to ten. With the mood he was in David might just get caught in the crossfire. "The girls are gone, " he bit out. "Thanks to -- " Richie glared at Jon.

His eyes widened as he plopped into a chair. "Ohhh thats a first, Kidd ran off a woman? What’s the world coming too?"

Jon studied David a moment and considered rearranging his face. "Why don't you shut the fuck up Joker? It's not funny."

"Is to me. The Day Jon Bon Jovi can’t handle it all? Its funny."

"Lema it really isn't funny, " Richie fought to remain calm but he could hear the darkness in every syllable he spoke.

"When the fuckin' royal highness of rock can't even figure out how to work a woman? Hell yeah it is funny man. Even Bri would tell ya that. She'd tell ya to go buy him some lessons." He glanced around the room as Richie's words finally sank in. "Oh come on, don't tell me, he ran her off too?"

"You win the prize Lema. Thanks to fuckhead my wife is gone too. She won’t leave G alone, and frankly It’s the fact I understand that pisses me off more. " Richie paused, " So whatcha gonna do MR FIX EVERYTHING?"

He shook his head as his mind whirled with ideas and questions. "First thing I'm going to do is take a shower." At Richie's glare he rolled his eyes. "I always think better in the shower jackass." Picking up his towel he started towards the bathroom, "Then I'm going figure out how to get her back."

"You better figure out pretty damn quick cuz I ain't waiting forever . I mean it Jon. Our sexless marriage is over if you don’t get this right. I won't hesitate to fuckin' walk out that door and follow my wife to wherever she took off too."

He stopped at the door and glanced back over his shoulder and saw the determined glint in his friends eyes. That look reminded him of the early 90's all over. "I said I'd fuckin' find a way to get her back."

Richie threw himself into the chair beside him. The only thing that kept him in the room was that almost 30 years of friendship. Other than that he would have told him to fuck off. He would leave if Jon didn’t make this right and he didn't care what his actions would cause. All he cared about his wife.Glancing up at Jon and seeing what Jon wouldn’t admit aloud yet kept him in the chair. That look of self loathing mixed with pain was giving Jon that chance.

Jon nodded as Richie finally sat. Glancing at David he inclined his head and hoped David would talk a bit of sense into his big friend. Stepping into the shower he quickly stripped then stepped into the stall, his hand swiftly setting the temperature to the hottest he could stand. She fucking left? God she left. I can’t believe I fucked up this badly. Jesus, she’s gone. What the hell am I going to do? Losing Rich, her, I can’t stand it. I gotta fix this. But how?

His mind swept over the days since he'd met her, each word, each action suddenly highlighted in his mind. Each moment he'd smiled for a fan then grimaced when she had a bad moment. His body felt chilled even under the heated spray as her words rose to attack him. Hell you give them more attention than me, all I want is to be held after feeling sick yet you scoot away, treat me like I have a disease or something.

His fist pounded against the tile wall as each sin against her rose to batter at his mind. "Fuck. You fuckin' idiot, you stupid self serving fucking idiot."

Richie sat there watching the doorway that lead to the shower waiting not so patiently as he fumbled with his phone, hoping against hope that she would call . He had even dialed her number a time or too before rapidly closing it No she's probably trying to console poor G. His heart not only ached for his wife but her best friend whom he had considered family , a sister he never had.

David glanced at Richie as he fumbled with his phone and sighed. This was one righteous mess. Jon had done some stupid shit before. His overwhelming drive to take them to the top had ruined one marriage as it was, now it seemed it would ruin two, before they'd even got started. Shaking his head he decided to stay out of it, at least for now. IF he called Ketsl like he wanted, he'd have three women gunning for Jon, and Carly, for all her mildness, would be the one to put the hurting on his friend.

"She'll come back man, she's gotta right? She does love ya."

"Yea that I don't doubt; but she won't leave G not like this. If you’d seen the poor girl, " RIchie sighed and shook his head. "She won't leave her friend alone. Only way she'll come back is if G does, and right now I think that is highly unlikely."

David shook his head, "So you find her and talk her into coming back. You have nearly four days man. Let Jon hang, he fucked up this marriage on his own."

“Like it or not he is my brother. Besides, he fucked things up he should fix it all. He should be the one to get them back. I warn you Joker, if he don't and I go? I ain't comin' back. " Richie reiterated his threat.

David snorted, "I hear ya, but I don't believe ya. Man you love the roar of the crowd too much. It's in your blood as bad as it’s in his. Tell me it ain’t my man."

"I could solo with no problems and you know it. I’m not givin' up the business just working with fuckhead in there."

He stood and started towards the door, his laugh escaping him. "Reminds me of a fight in the 90's my brother. You said that back then too and look where you are. Twenty seven years, later, you're still the right hand of God." He glanced back and winked, "You'll set him straight now just like you did then. Just remember what ya did and do it again." He strolled out whistling. It was time to call his kitten and alert her to the goings on in Joviland.

"I dunno man I seriously thought G could reach him. Since she left I don’t know anymore. He is not that carefree don’t give a fuck kidd now. He’s something different. " He watched Jon return from the shower and grunted, “I don’t even know if we can find the Kidd now. It may be too late.”.

Jon stepped into the dressing room, Richie’s words arrowing into his heart. Had he changed that much? Was he that far gone? He shook his head as he noticed Richie hadn't taken time to even change or shower after the show. The look in his eyes was one of fury and worry. He still hadn't figured out how to get Geena back, but he knew if he didn't he would have damaged the only partnership that had lasted through the years, and the one he had started to hope would last into eternity. "Not gonna get rid of the stage stink man?"

"Not til I hear what you're gonna do about this mess you got us in." He crossed his arms and leaned forward, his face determined.

His brow cocked upwards at the belligerent tone of Richie's voice. "I'm gonna get her back, which will bring little miss perfect along my man. Once I figure out where she is." He grinned slightly, "She ain't getting away over stupid words. I'll figure it out. Somehow."

"Don't be so sure and watch what you say about my wife jackass. You, my friend, had a gem and now she's gone. If they don't want to be found they won’t. Her friends will make sure she is hidden well. From what Bri has said the Jovi sisterhood is like our circle; tight and very close knit."

Richie's words stopped him cold. "We have more money than all those Jovi girls combined. They CAN be found." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath; no one could be as tight knit as the brotherhood. Could they? "I mean…" He fell into the couch, and growled. They could be that fuckin’ close. He knew it. "Hell."

"Yes bro they can, thick as thieves from what I have heard thru the grapevine. Money doesn't always work for everything. "Richie paused as he glanced out the doorway. "And I don't think you should be calling Carly anytime soon."

Jon snorted, "Now why would I want to call David's little paramour?"

"You think he isn't telling his sweetie what you’ve done? She maybe quiet as a mouse but Carly has a fierce loyalty to G and Bri. So unless you want some shit removed that you are fond of remember she's a Jersey girl too, " Richie reminded him.

Jon winced. He'd forgotten for the moment exactly who Carly was. "Well fuck. I'll just have to risk harm to my fuckin' nuts man, cuz I guarantee the girls may just head that way to throw us off."

“You’re probably right about that man. The Jersey girls won't let you within 30 feet of her, " RIchie smirked. Even though the anger was still deep within him, the visual of little Carly taking Jon down a notch or two suddenly lifted his spirits just a bit .

He stood and took his duffle bag in hand, his eyes never leaving Richie's face. He wasn't sure how he was going to fix this. Fuck, he wasn't even sure he could now. As he stepped towards the door Geena's face, her eyes filled with anger and pain flashed into his head and twisted the screws of his pain a little tighter. Why had he done what he did? Shit, he'd gone without so many times, sex wasn't that major a deal usually, but one night without her and he'd acted like an idiot. One night without HER. His hand curled into a fist as he punched the wall beside him. "When did she become that fuckin' important man? Jesus, one night, one fucking night and the next day I ruin it all. Why?"

Richie stood up then lay a hand on his shoulder clasping it tightly. The urge to slug him died the moment he took a look into those eyes and saw, for the first time, the pain of love and love lost. "Because you never got it before man. I think this is the moment you finally realize and admit to yourself that you do love her. When you love someone, or has it been that long that you’ve forgotten it all? When you love someone you want to be with them in every way possible, to feel their arms around you while you sleep, to be buried so deep within them you don't ever want to leave.” He managed a smile. “That hit you I guess, and thats when you lost it.”

He sighed slightly, “That girl of yours needed your support. She's never had a baby before and she is suffering far worse than I have seen with Dot or Heather. And what did you do? You pushed her away like she had the plague. Even though it may seem not a big deal to you, it is to them. Its not any easy job carrying a child, whether you wanted it to happen or not. So suck it up and be man I know you can be and not just because you have to. "

He groaned, his head falling onto his hand as he braced against the wall. "Dot was always so self sufficient, she never really needed me man. I don't know how to ...." He glanced up and sighed, "She barely wanted me around. Why do you think we toured so much?"

"Yea that’s right. But man you need to quit comparing her to Dot and assume she is just like that. Geena would never even let on that is what she needed. If Bri hadn’t of brought it to your attention you would have still been in the dark because that’s the way G is. She would have just continued to try and love you without getting anything in return. Thing is, it would eat at her until she couldn't take it anymore. Consider this the wake up call most folks don’t get." Richie paused, his hand still grasping Jon's shoulder. "Just show her you love her. Hell it’s really not that hard to do you know. She’s easy to love. Comfort her after she's spent hours in the bathroom praying to the porcelain gods, after she is carrying your child. Don't make her feel like she is doing this alone. You wanna a second chance of doing it better with your kids? This is your chance Jonny."

Jon's head lifted as he forced himself to breathe. "Yeah, first thing though is to find her. I .." He looked back at Richie and hated himself for having to ask. He'd always been the one with the answers before. "Problem is I have no idea where to start."

"You could try calling her cell even if you have to just leave a message it will make her think , G's a smart girl , and she has it bad for you. If you think she is at Carly's we could go there, or grovel to David to get his help." RIchie bit back a smirk as the last few words left his mouth.

Jon shivered, "I'd never live it down. He'd use it against me forever." Even as the words left his lips his hand was reaching for his phone, his finger pushing the quick dial that led to Geena. Listening to the ring, then to the automatic shift to voice mail he grimaced. "Baby, its me. I don't blame you for going. I know I didn’t do enough. But I'm going to find you Mrs. Bongiovi. I'm gonna prove that you're important...." He swallowed hard as the pain of her absence finally sank in. "I... dammit I love you Geena. I'll get you back. Just wait and see."