Chapter 56

She leaned in to pay the cabbie then turned to stare at Geena's small but familar and safe home. She'd been non-communicado for three or four days, not speaking to a soul after all that had happened. Days she'd spent circling the same hour over and over until she was ready to scream.

It had started crazily enough, as a dare, a simple seven minutes there with Richie, his gentle presence keeping her from screaming bloody murder as the memories of Jared arose. The night had passed in a haze, with hands gentling each shiver every time the phone rang. And then it had all went wrong, the shine taken off the fantasy as reality pinged and ponged in the morning sun. He’d leaned in to kiss her awake and she’d tasted wine. He’d had to have something to make it through the little breakdown? How bad could it get if Jared really upped the ante?

”But baby, it was just a glass. It was sitting there and I finished it off, I didnt even think. My mind was just on keeping you warm Darlin'.”

"One step backward Rich, and all because of me. One step leads to another. I can't DO that to you I can't"

She'd ran from his suite so fast, not taking time to think or get anything, He still had her phone for Christ sakes, everything but the purse she'd managed to grab before hitting the door. She'd wandered for days, taking flights here and there, her credit card screaming at each and every stop.

She'd stopped in various internet cafe's; ghosting the boards, watching twitter and laughing to see Jon doing exactly as she thought.he would. Suddenly Bon Jovi was going oh so public, She'd lay money on the fact he was doing it to get to Geena.

G. God what was she thinking about it all? She'd not spoken to anyone in days, not even her best friend, and the more time she spent with her thoughts, the more inclined she was to find Seattle and let him know how wrong she'd been. That would have been wrong though and she knew it. So what if the thought of him had everything in side of her hurting? So what if every little picture she saw of him set the pain sensors to maximum overload?

It had been a beautiful fantasy week, he'd get over it soon enough. She be a sweet memory, forgotten and nearly faceless given enough time. That was how it should be. It would keep him safe from the dangers she could cause.

****

Jon glanced over at Richie and frowned, He'd gotten so quiet over the last few days. Sure he was all smiles when the cameras were on, and he was giving 200% to rehearsals, but there was something off, something too quiet about his best friend.

He could understand that one though. Ever since the day Geena had stepped onto the flight home he'd been fighting this stupid ache inside. Felt like his heart had suddenly sprouted a hole that he couldn't fill, no matter how he tried. Shit, he knew if he looked in the mirror his face would mimic that lost expression he'd seen on Rich's face that day in Maui. He was a sad sack, ghosting that stupid twitter thing for her responses. He’d added her name and Bri’s just to see them. And you say you ain’t got it bad? He only hoped those photo's he'd leaked online of Richie eating sushi would make their way to Bri. She had to see how lost he was.

His ache intensified as he sat staring at the Twitter screen, Richie's words still circling in his brain.

"Man I fucked up big time. Months on the wagon, and my fear for her made me stupid. I had some wine man, she called me on it and left. I gotta find a way back to her man, I gotta."

They wouldn't be in Seattle, he knew that much, but he was damned sure he could reach them. He logged into Twitter, shook his head at all the responses and typed:

BonJovi this is jon. we are learning lots of old stuff. any requests...

Within seconds the responses started pouring in, the multitude of them once again reminding him how his real women had been right. After an hour or so of watching everything but the kitchen sink in the way of songs be thrown at them he glanced up to see his brother motioning him to come along for sound check.

BonJovi Going to rehearsal now

BonJovi wild is the wind. something for the pain, little bit of soul, homebound train. today jbj

Typing in his final words he managed a grin and muttered. "Think on that."

As Geena signed into Twitter for a daily check of tweets from friends and what not , the main one she hoped to hear from was Bri. She was so damned worried that she hadn't heard from her in days. Oh Well maybe she was having a good time.It was about time she had a break. She hoped so anyway . She had posted all of her pics of Hawaii, not her personal ones however, no one could ever know about her and Jon. That was her own special memory to savor forever.

"Jon." She sighed his name on a half breath. She missed him more than life itself, but she really had to move on . They had talked before she left and he had said what she thought he would. He wasn't ready for anything right now. It broke her heart to actually hear the words not matter how much she'd understood where they had come from.

When she got home all she wanted to do was curl up in her bed. She almost decided on No Jovi for awhile, but her members counted on her to keep them up to date. So she posted her pictures , tweeted the latest updates. She clicked on the new tweets and saw the ones from Jon, and was surprised he was asking for requests. She tapped her keyboard thinking of what she could ask for.

Jovimistress @bonjovi would you please play Hallelujah or Born to Be My Baby

She clicked send and leaned back from the computer for a moment. Why did she ask for Born? It was beyond her, she just felt an intense need to hear him sing it. She was about to tweet another request when she heard a knock on the door. She scooted back from the desk and went to open the door.

"Bri! What the fuck girl ? Where have you been? What are you doing here? "Geena rambled as she pulled her friend into a big embrace.

She shivered slightly as the heat from inside pushed against the frigid cold of outside. It wanted to warm her and she just didn't want to feel warm ."I Dunno, here and there."

"Get your ass in here," Geena ordered as she yanked on her arm and shut the door. "A'right whats wrong? Why aren't you with Rich? Do you want some coffee or wine ? "

Her mouth twisted at the idea of either, wine especially. "I couldn't risk stayin, couldn't risk coming here." She glanced up wide eyed, "He hasn’t contacted you has he? He still has my phone."

"No I haven't heard from anyone," Geena sighed.

She watched the emotions play out on her friends face and sighed. "Honey, give it time. Takes more than a day to knock sense into a stubborn man."

"Bri he told me himself he wasn't ready and he was sorry if he is hurting me but," Geena fingers went up to make air quotes, "he's just not ready for anything." She poured some wine for herself and moved to the kitchen to fix Bri a cup of coffee, returning to the living room to hand her the cup. "But look at this. he tweeted again." Geena pointed to her laptop sceen.

Her gaze flicked to the screen. "He's taking requests?" She blinked as a new tweet came in from the Bon Jovi name, its teasing temptation a picture link. She turned from the computer, fighting the urge to click, her eyes steady on the banks of snow outside the window. "If I didn't know better someone would be saying look at what your missing."

"They're posting pics now?" Geena clicked the link. "OH god, what is he doing? "

At the sound of Geena's voice, her gaze flicked back to see a screen full of Bon Jovi, standing outside. It looked recent, all too recent, the beads she'd given Richie securely around his neck, the Seattle tower behind them. He looked good, way too good. And he was smiling. Maybe she'd been right, once he'd gotten over the need to feel responsible for the girl he'd screwed for a week, he'd gotten ok. I hope he's ok, I hope he hasn't had more to drink. She turned back to the window, her voice quiet, "Guess they meant they were gonna shake it up this tour."

Geena sat down at her laptop staring at that the picture her eyes never leaving Jon. He was dressed in camoflauge, and looked so damn good with that smile. "Fuck," She muttered and she typed

Jovimistress @Bonjovi looking good there , kick ass tonight

She had almost said miss you, wish I was there, but held off and backed away from the laptop and finished her glass of wine only to refill it again.

She took a sip of coffee, and found herself moving back to Geena's computer only to stare at the picture again. She hadn't checked the twitter or forum in days, afraid too really. "How'd it get so fucked up? It was supposed to just be a fantasy."

Geena shook her head "Beats the hell out of me. I guess the saying is true, be very careful of what you wish for."

She pushed away from the computer and managed the first half decent laugh in days. "No truer words. Could ya point me to your spare room? I, well I need to take a nap or ... " She hadn't been sleeping too well, thats when she MISSED him the worst. "I haven’t been getting alot of sleep with all the traveling I been doing. Liar liar pants on fire.

"Oh sure first door on the left silly, you know the way." Geena watched her friend, her face pale and wan. Geeze, leaving him really has you muddled. Why did you Bri? Speak up.

She stepped over to her friend,noting the quizzical look in her eyes, and hugged her again. "I'll explain later, I will, I just can't now." With that she moved down the hallway and into the spare room, laying down fully clothed on the bed only to stare at the wall, visualizing a tall lanky form clad only in a smile.